Kathleen Ameche: Hi! I am Kathy Ameche and I am discussing how to balance work and family life. Now, I am going to talk about how to figure out what you want in life. Before you can start balancing your life, you need to take a look at what it is and how it compares to the way you want it to be. In my experience, it boils down to asking yourself one hard question. That question is what do you want? Is your life running you ragged? Are you having fun? Are you working with people you like, that inspire you? Are you making money that you think you are worth? Again, what do you really want from your work?

If the answers to these question are no, you can organize like crazy and balance like a ballerina, and it's still not going to be alright. We will like wearing shoes that don't fit. If you don't have a clear path, you are going to get lost. I am not saying wandering is a bad thing, that's not being lost, that's exploring. It's good for the soul, but it's important to recognize when you are lost or are going in circles with a wrong direction. All kinds of resources are available to help you find out what you want to be if and when you grow up; from the classics what color is you parachute, to career counselors and coaches. That's not what I am here to explain. But I have to say, if it can't solve this one and get yourself grounded, everything else will pile on top of you. What you want may also change over time; your goals and needs when you are single and in your 20s, to when your career has taken off and you have a family to juggle can and should be different. We talked about baseline earlier. If down deep inside, you don't know who you are and what type of life you want to build for yourself, you could take a lot of deviations and then that's not going to help you. Let's assume for the moment that you know what you want from your career, make a list and really look at how you feel. Are you meeting your expectations? Reality check. Now, is a really time to take a deep breath and repeat after me. I am not super woman. I cannot meet everyone's expectations. Remember, she is a fictional character. Say it again about three times, I am not super woman. In fact, what if you started saying it every morning? How might that change your day?

Unrealistic expectations are the source of most of life's imbalance. For example, if you agree to be in a client meeting at 4 P.

M and your son is making his little league debut at the same time, you are bound to be stressed and someone will be disappointed. Identifying what you want is essential to finding better work-life balance, because it is based on your and not other's expectations of you. So that's why you need to know what you want form life before you can work on keeping it balanced. Next, I will talk about how to take the first step toward organizing and prioritizing your life.