How to Milk a Cow

Well, good morning buckerers and buckets. I see we all got up early this morning because we are going to learn how to milk a cow. I think it is natural; everybody is got to milk a cow once in their life. So, I am going to show you how. My name is Farmer Jack, born and raised outside Albuquerque in Mexico. My grandfather showed me how and I am going to show you. I have got the sweetest little 1400 pound Holstein right here. Her name is Sunshine and well, she is a dairy cow, but there is something special about her, as all kinds of other cows is the world, do not get me wrong, you got Guernsey, Jerseys, Brown Swiss, it is where you get your chocolate milk but these are Holsteins. We are talking pure bred Holstein here. They are the largest dairy cows in the world. Now, if we treat her real sweet, we give her a lot of alfalfa, we give her a lot of molasses grain, we give her a lot of water, we give her a lot of hugs and you know what, she is going to give us over 14, 13-14 gallons of milk. That is more than any other cow. It is almost double what any other cow in the whole world puts out. So, that makes Holsteins very special. When you talk about homogenized milk that is homogenized means blended, so you are talking about milk that is blended mainly with about 70-80% Holstein and then, some other types of milk that gives it flavor.

So, we are going to need a couple of things for this next segment because we are going to milk a cow by hand. We do not milk cows by hand any more because it takes too darn long. So, what is the first thing you need to milk a cow? That s right, a cow. Now, second thing is a bucket. So, get your bucket and your cow ready. We are going to learn how to milk a cow.