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How to Build In-Law Relationships

What helps to build enjoyable, strong relationships with in-laws?

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John Spiegel
http://www.mediationoffice.net/  

<span>An experienced family-law attorney, John Spiegel has devoted his practice exclusively to family mediation since 1996. John is a graduate of Yale Law School and has been active as a mediation trainer and presenter in Maryland and nationally. He served in 2003 and 2004 as President of the Maryland Council for Dispute Resolution (MCDR), a statewide ADR practitioners’ organization, and in 2005 – 2008 as President of the Montgomery County Divorce Roundtable, an interdisciplinary professional organization. John has published articles on mediation and law reform issues and has lobbied on behalf of these issues before the Maryland General Assembly. In 2001, he received recognition as a Certified Mediator from MCDR. The father of four children, John views mediation as a continuation of his legal work on behalf of children and families.</span>

What helps to build enjoyable, strong relationships with in-laws?

In this video Mediator John Spiegel discusses the difficulties of In-law Relationships.

This expert: 76,512 views

This series: 10,010 views

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John Spiegel: Hi I am John Spiegel. I am a family mediator and we are going to talk now about how to build good relationship with your in-lawsHost: What helps build enjoyable, strong relationships with in-laws?

John Spiegel: What I encourage people to do is to think long term and to think strategically about these relationships. These can be precious relationships and they are worth investing time in. Well, how do you think strategically, what does that mean? Okay, so the key thing that people can do, is to be good listeners. I think everyone on the planet is just eager to have someone else take real interest in them and to listen with full attention. So, one of the ways to think strategically is to try to picture in your mind how you can create a situation where you get listen to that person and it has to be done one on one and then when you have got that opportunity, then you are going to want to ask them open ended questions about their lives and about their thinking and about the things that are of interest to them. Get interested in what they have to say and let it be visible that you are interested, if people can do that one thing to listen with interest, to ask open ended questions, to resist the temptation too quickly, to break in with their own stories that they reminded of and just keep the focus on the person that you are building a relationship with. You are just going to just from the get go, you will be way out ahead of what you expect.

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