Speaker: If the relationships ends, how will you keep this from negatively impacting your work relationship?

Toni Coleman: It really depends on the individuals like so many other things, depends on what somebody is willing and able to do. Certainly, I would hope that folks would be thinking about that before they begin the relationship and asking themselves those questions and a lot of people do. Of course, we never really know how we are going to feel when we were in a situation, but there should be the difference between how we feel and how we respond to our feelings. So if they have decided that they want this relationship and they are willing to take that risk, then if this relationship does not work out and you're going to need to be able to step back and to set a boundary and to deal with this person in a professional and the appropriate way and leave all of the stuff that went wrong out of it. Sometimes people just can not; depending on what went wrong, it could be really pretty bad.

It could have been some very painful stuff that occurred and if that is the case and they really have not worked it through for themselves and they just can't deal with them when they see the person, then that's when they are going to have to make a decision about perhaps finding another job or asking for transfer within the company, that kind of thing. It happens all the times because folks just can't, they just can't handle that they thought they could, but they could not.

So that's one of things I tell people right upfront when they ask me. What should I worry about most with this relationship, if it ends and you are in environment together and you have to see them every day.