What are some questions that couples can ask that help determine their readiness for marriage?
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Toni Coleman, MSW is a licensed psychotherapist, relationship coach and founder of http://www.consum-mate.com. As a recognized expert, Toni has been quoted in many local and national publications including; The Chicago Tribune, The Orlando Sentinel, New York Daily News, Indianapolis Star and Newsweek newspapers and Family Circle, Woman's Day, Cosmo Style, Tango, Men's Health, Star (regularly quoted body language expert), People, and Nirvana magazines. She has been featured on abcnews.com, discovery.health.com, aolnews.com, MSN.com, Match.com and planetearthradio.com. Toni is also the featured relationship coach in “The Business And Practice Of Coaching,” (published by Norton, September 2005); and is the author of the forward for,” Winning Points With The Woman In Your Life, One Touchdown At A Time” ( published by Simon and Schuster, November 2005). Toni offers dating and relationship help and advice through her syndicated column, "Dear Dating Coach," and her popular monthly newsletter, "The Art of Intimacy." From March 2005 until December 2005, she was a weekly contributing commentator (love and dating coach) on the KTRS Radio Morning Show, (St. Louis, MO). Toni is a member of The International Coach Federation, The International Association of Coaches and The National Association of Social Workers.
What are some questions that couples can ask that help determine their readiness for marriage?
Host: What are some questions that couples can ask that help determine their readiness for marriage?
Toni Coleman: That's something that comes up a lot when I work with single people as well as couples, how can we have this conversation? What exactly can we ask to make sure we have covered the important things? Some of the things would be, a good way to start questions is how do you feel about or how important is or is this something that you feel comfortable with or you don't feel comfortable with? So questions pose that way a very good, open-ended kind of questions and then it's going to depend upon what's important to the individual asking the question.
How do you feel about having children? How do you feel about things like the importance of couple time together? Very important question. How do you feel about the whole family thing? How important is family to you? How important is it that we spend time with friends and that we have couple of friends and we have this network of friends that we spend time together.
Transcripts
Host: What are some questions that couples can ask that help determine their readiness for marriage?
Toni Coleman: That's something that comes up a lot when I work with single people as well as couples, how can we have this conversation? What exactly can we ask to make sure we have covered the important things? Some of the things would be, a good way to start questions is how do you feel about or how important is or is this something that you feel comfortable with or you don't feel comfortable with? So questions pose that way a very good, open-ended kind of questions and then it's going to depend upon what's important to the individual asking the question.
How do you feel about having children? How do you feel about things like the importance of couple time together? Very important question. How do you feel about the whole family thing? How important is family to you? How important is it that we spend time with friends and that we have couple of friends and we have this network of friends that we spend time together. How important do you think it is that we go to church or we share the same faith or if we don't that we are able to find a place in the middle, where we can have this -- have God in our lives or have this higher power in our life and be able to really share that together or is it not important? So I think it's really -- the individual has to think about what matters most of them usually involves lifestyle usually involves values, family, money those kinds of things and then ask the questions that are really going to target those things and generally if they are able to actually do that. They feel comfortable enough and the other person is able to sit there and really try to honestly answer some of those and stay involved in the dialog without trying to change the subject, turning on the television set, avoiding, not answering the questions. Then they will have to have a pretty good start.
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